SMOLDER: I hate to say it, but I think teatime is over.
CINDER: Surely not! You’ve barely even poured the cups.
SMOLDER: I know, Cindy, but I did try to warn you.
CINDER: On the contrary! You objected so long that even agreeing to have tea took forever. And now you say we’re finished without the least reason for it.
SMOLDER: It is nearly 4:30.
CINDER: … yes, and? Do you have another engagement? Is there some-
KNIGHT: Die, foul villains!
SQUIRE: Go get them, sir!
CINDER: How dare you!
SMOLDER: Here we go.
KNIGHT: Stand and fight, fiend!
CINDER: Look what you’ve done! That was our great-grandmother’s! Just how do you think you’re going to pay for this?
KNIGHT: You’re the one who’s going to pay.
SMOLDER: Sir, I wouldn’t advise- …Too late.
KNIGHT: Hey! Let me down!
CINDER: That cup was thousands of years old! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find tea sets in that size?
KNIGHT: Put me down, or I’ll… tea sets?
SQUIRE: Why you beast! Take tha-
SMOLDER: I wouldn’t bother her at the moment. She was very fond of that set.
KNIGHT: What have you done to him? If you hurt him, I swear I shall-
SMOLDER: He seems to have fainted.
CINDER: Well, set him on the couch, for goodness sakes. As for you, I demand restitution!
KNIGHT: Then fight, demon! Or do you only attack helpless damsels and squires?
CINDER: Damsels? What the devil is he talking about? What would we want with damsels?
SMOLDER: I did try to warn you.
CINDER: You can’t possibly have objected to tea simply because… Smo, you didn’t.
SMOLDER: Me? Certainly, not. Cousin Comb, however… umm, well, it seems that he is off his medication again.
CINDER: But he lives two kingdoms over!
SMOLDER: I know. He and Aunt ‘Ferno came for a visit a few weeks ago. He went out for a bit – said he was going to stretch his wings. The next thing I know, these knights started showing up. And they always come at teatime. They’re quite amazingly predictable. I have yet to understand-
CINDER: You explained, surely!
SMOLDER: Well, certainly. I could hardly do otherwise. But you’ve seen for yourself how well they listen! They come in swinging, and that’s that. And when I contacted Aunt ‘Ferno, she refused to do anything about it.
CINDER: Of course. You know as well as I do that she would never admit her precious Combustion could do such a thing.
KNIGHT: Er… Pardon the interruption, ladies, but are you saying that a different dragon took the damsels?
SMOLDER: It certainly wasn’t us!
CINDER: Really, damsels are such insipid creatures. I much prefer tea and biscuits.
SMOLDER: Besides, it’s horribly impolite to eat things that can talk.
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